Story ofmy Life

Small Moment of Truth

I heard a knock on the glass behind me: I was sitting in the periodical section of Borders, a ceiling to floor length window at my back.

I turned to see a tiny girl standing there. She wore a blue dress with white polka-dots and she stood about as tall as my cross-legged height.
Her expression was oddly serious as she waved at me. I returned the gesture and waited, positive she was about to reveal some introspective secret, or the name of my first child...
She intently stared back at me before leaning forward to speak, her words solid and muffled against the glass: "I want ice cream."

I then watched her turn to walk away. I felt gypped, like the time I opened a box of chocolate-covered macadamia nuts on Christmas (ooh my favorite!) only to find a hat inside.
Where was my gem of wisdom tiny prophet? What's my destiny??

I'd come to Borders to research Graduate Schools, read about publication options, and contemplate life. I suddenly realized this miniature girl had looked at a complete stranger and announced her deepest and truest desire. No sugar-coating, no apologies; she knows what she wants and isn't afraid to let it be known.
If anything it reminded me to stop bullshitting myself and go after exactly what I want and what will make me feel fulfilled.

I should have looked up at the next person who wandered past me in the periodical section and shouted: "I want to be happy!"

Today

Today is a good day.

A poem about my first kiss will be my first poem published.

Hugs for everyone!

Scrubs Quote ofthe Day

Of course I'm holding back! I'm insane, you idiot! Remember the other day, when you told me that I had pit stains? Well, I have cried every fifteen minutes on the half-hour since you told me that. I am wracked with self-doubt. I have panic attacks. I'm claustrophobic, germaphobic, phobiaphobic. I talk to myself. I talk to my cat. I talk to three separate shrinks about the fact that often my cats respond to me in my mother's voice.

And yesterday, when that stupid pretty surgical nurse handed you a pair of latex gloves, I almost killed the guy whose leg I was stitching up because I couldn't stop thinking about the two of you having sex on a box of steaks! Why a box of steaks? 'Cause my dad had an affair with a female butcher! And, as I mentioned before, I am insane. There! I opened up! Are you happy?

- Elliot

I'm Guessing

Everyone at one point in their lives looks around and asks, "What does everybody else know that I don't?"

I'm in limbo - and not the fun, get grandma drunk, put a party hat on her head, see how far she can lean back before her artificial hip breaks kind - but the depressing confusing kind.

Quote ofthe Day

"As she rubs Louis's back, Clarissa thinks, Take me with you. I want a doomed love. I want streets at night, wind and rain, no one wondering where I am."

from

The Hours

by Michael Cunningham

10 Things I Think About

10 Things I Think About While Waiting to Board an Airplane

1. Who sitting around me has a fear of flying

2. How many people just said goodbye to someone they love

3. How many people are on some form of medication

4. How many people in the terminal are unhappy

5. Why some people prefer window v. aisle

6. Who is flying to see someone they love

7. Will we hit turbulence & will it be the fun kind or the scary kind

8. Who is the person that I'll end up sitting next to & will I get to find out

9. How many people just said goodbye to someone they are glad to leave

10. What do other people think about when they wait to board a plane