Saturday, March 27, 2010

Life Philosophy

My goal:

(I'm trying to learn to live in the moment)

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

X-Ray Vision?

I had my tarot cards read in Krakow.

I'd never done anything like it before and to call me "skeptical", then and now, would be an understatement.

But I still get chills when I think about what I was told by this Englishman, a hostel employee who read through his handmade tarot cards by candlelight in the kitchen, voices from the hostel bar rattling off the walls.
White paper squares curled at the edges from use.
Crude little pen doodles.
A future that I could feel
and
A present that I know.

I still think about all of this, a lot
and at the time I wanted to laugh and shout "are you shitting me?"

I doubt I'll ever ask for my tarot cards to be read again. I would feel like I was cheating on Krakow, on this Englishman, and on the truth.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Exposure of a Stupid Secret

I love this quote by A.A. Milne so freakin' much I've contemplated having it tattooed on my body multiple times. I've never told anyone because I'm embarassed of the seeming juvenile-nature of the quote.

"Whatever fortune brings, don't be afraid of doing things."
.
It bugs me how much I love the quote because it sounds like it was written for a four year old with learning disabilities.
I guess maybe the simplicity resonates - taps into my ongoing problems with anxiety, shyness, and habit-for-excuses. I don't know. Just don't be surprised if someday this conversation occurs between us...
.
You: Come in the pool!
Me: Uhhmm okay but I'm keeping my shirt on.
You: Why?
Me: *silence*

Recently

I've sleeping more hours than I am awake

I've been lying more than I can take

& I've been faking things I shouldn't fake.

Yet I'm the happiest I've been in a longgg time -
what does this say about me?

I mean, really?

Monday, March 15, 2010

Lyrics ofthe Day

I'm frightened by the devil
And I'm drawn to those ones that ain't afraid
I remember that time you told me, you said
Love is touching souls
Surely you touched mine
Cause part of you pours out of me
In these lines from time to time

Oh, you're in my blood like holy wine
You taste so bitter and so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you darling
Still I'd be on my feet
I would still be on my feet.
.
I met a woman
She had a mouth like yours
She knew your life
She knew your devils and your deeds
And she said
Go to him, stay with him if you can
But be prepared to bleed

Oh but you are in my blood you're my holy wine
You're so bitter, bitter and so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you darling
Still I'd be on my feet
I would still be on my feet -


Joni Mitchell
. A Case of You .

(Joni)



Friday, March 12, 2010

Moment Held in Captivity.

I went to a zoo recently.

A tiger yawned.
A peacock fanned its feathers.
Two wolves howled at the cold blue sky.

All were something you wished would happen -
they did.

We are patient without even knowing it, aren't we?

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

I Wanna Hold Your Hand

-
-
-
-
-
Holy babyface Batman!
George (14), John (16), & Paul (15)

I'm in love.

All over again.