Wednesday, April 29, 2009

It's Like Meeting the Man of Your Dreams

As I sat on the hilltop overlooking the ocean, gulls soaring above & waves sparkling below, I noticed something even more breathtaking in my line of sight: A gorgeous (and shirtless) young man, frolicking in the surf with his dog.
Wistfully looking up at the clouds I daydreamed....
Me(after seductively climbing down the cliff to the sand below): Oh! Hello I didn't see you there. May I pet your playfully charming dog?
McHottie: Why, of course. His name is Scout.
Me: My cat is named Scout!
Us: (Proceed to twirl on the sand and possibly hardcore make out)

My daydream was suddenly broken when the guy started yelling up at me and I realized the dog had scrambled up the hillside and was galloping in my direction. The dog slammed its wet body into me. I looked down at McSexy and he yells "Hey, can you hold her while I grab the leash?"
Pssh...can I hold her...faw...mahoo..hehe...
I start to pet her sopping sandy hair and then flip her tag around. The word Scout jumps out at me and my heart freezes.
I look up to see McShirtless jogging towards me in the flesh. He thanks me while laughing something about a training gone awry and I blurt out "I named my cat Scout!"
He laughs and then.he.says. "Besides To Kill a Mockingbird I've never met another Scout."
I jizzed in my pants. Somehow I managed to say "That's why I chose the name -"
He chuckles "Oh yeah? Me too!"
He thanks me again right as I hear footsteps approaching. I turn to see a young blonde woman walking towards us, with a baby strapped to her stomach.

It's not called ironic Alanis. It's called fucking sucks.

Oh and PS - i'm totally psychic. minus the whole twirling/makingout part...

1 comment:

Sara Madelyn said...

Ahhhhh.... Fuck!!!

How hot and sucky at the same time!

If we wrote a romance novel with alternate endings we could use this for inspiration....

Go to page 60 if you run down the hill to pet the dog

Go to page hopeless if you wait for the dog to run up to you and find out the guy has a baby....

Funny how love said backwards sounds like evil.....romance has a way of fucking with you like that.